My Christmas list

All I want for Christmas, let's see the list is so long. I would like to be able to use the bathroom without being interrupted. Pee with the door closed, shower without someone coming in with me, or a flattering comment about my body parts, or how I smell. I would like a vacation on a beach with chiseled men licking my toes (not really into that but I'd give it a try) and feeding me alcohol by the gallon.
I'd like a house that keeps itself cleaned, a closet that stays full with clothes that fit no matter what. A personal chef and a house elf to keep things going while I'm at school or away.
I'd like a nanny, or two, so there are no more two o'clock in the am wake up screams, and Saturday mornings that start before the sun rises. I'd like to get wasted drunk and not have to wake up to a little person under my covers telling me they think they smell beer. Why and when did you get in my bed anyways?
Back to the vacation, it needs to be somewhere with white sand, and blue water. And I need to be able to swim without worrying about my hair when I get out.
I'd like to be able to come home from work, and have all of my time to focus on the kids I brought into the world. This brings us back to having a house elf and a chef. If you can see there is a theme going. I don't want to have to worry about bills, and homework, and snagging a state job with good benefits.
Did I mention I'd like to pee without having conversations while I'm doing it? Never mind the conversations; I want to be able to go in the bathroom without being asked if I have to pee or poop, or whether I washed my hands. Who raised this kid anyways? Does anyone else’s kid need to know this information?
What I would most like is to see my children grow and be happy and successful, I'd like to be able to spend every waking hour with the ones I love and not the ones I spend my days with now. Who I in no way shape or form love.
I want to make memories that last a lifetime, splash in blue water with two other pairs of feet splashing besides me.
But what I would really really like first and foremost is to get a god damn lock on my bathroom door.

My President is Black

So instead of filling people’s newsfeeds on fb I am choosing to go low key this year. We all know who I am voting for and while it is because I’m black, it’s because I believe that this man Barrack is the man who should be in charge of our country. I believe in him, I never doubted him when others said he wasn’t keeping his promises. I love this man, and I don’t know him, I love the way he talks, I love his relationship with his wife, I love how he treats his daughters. I love him because he is our president. And by ours I mean us as displaced Africans. He is ours; it doesn’t matter if his skin is light, if he wasn’t raised around us. He knows who he is, and I’m sure many a republican has called him all the names I have been called in my life.

I do not consider myself an American, although I am happy to have the right to vote, and to have the rights that we are said to have. I know that this is not my country and that my people came here without their own consent. That said this election is the most important in my life. This election is a decision that our nation has to make. What rides on this to me is my children’s future. Not only my children’s future but my friends children, the families I work with, their education system.

I write this as a mother of a child who was able to go to school because of government subsidies that helped us to be able to pay for his early childhood education. I write this as a mother whose daughter receives WIC and if she didn’t we would not be able to afford her prescription formula, because she has allergies that we cannot afford. It is not that we are not hard workers; my husband works more than he is home. I work and go to school to get my second and third degree so we can make more money and not have to ask for any help. There have been moments in my son’s life where he didn’t have any insurance; since we have had him on child health plus another government funded program he has never missed an appointment.

How can anyone, want someone who has such disregard for families, women, minorities and their needs to run this nation. Does Romney know that it is a stated fact that we as black families make less money than anyone else in this country? No he thinks like most rich white people that we are lazy and wait for handouts. It’s been stated. I go to school with financial aid, and I am proud to be in school, to be working hard to give my children the same opportunities that I had. I want my son to see me and be inspired. His mom could work, take care of home and take 15 credits a semester. I want to be their hero.

Is it our fault that my pay rate is way less than my white counter parts? That society steers us to only be able to live in certain areas, and if we don’t we will be made to feel so uncomfortable that we would end up moving? I want to know what else Romney wants me to do. I know I am not the only parent who has these hard ships. I speak to people like myself on an everyday basis.

So when I’m asked why I want Obama to win and will be heartbroken if he doesn’t these are some of my reasons. I feel proud when my son says he wants to be like this man who likes him on the television. I cried with tears of joy when I saw him walk across the stage during his inauguration. It is not all about race, but it is uplifting to see someone who looks like me. As young Jeezy said “My president is black”, and he deserves 4 more years.

 

Zoey turns 1!

My daughter is turning one, and because of this I am planning her birthday party. I have always had birthday parties so to me this seems like the norm, you have a party, and celebrate with your friends and family. Show off your child, and have everyone ooh and ahh over the child that you pushed out a year ago.

That being said there had been a lot of conversations going on in my house with how much is too much as the main topic. My husband has never had parties, even a sleepover that he can remember. I have, always every year in some way celebrated my birthday. I’ve thrown myself parties when my parents thought I was too old to really continue doing so. I have bought myself presents, gotten my hair done. I mean this was the day that I was born, so it needs to be fabulous.

My son has had some great parties, but since his is in the summer it’s a little easier to make people entertained. My daughter was blessed like me to be born in the late fall. So hers has to be fabulous. That being said Ive been to many a wedding and or party, and the whole time I was at this sham  I thought, well how sad is it that my daughters party will be nicer than this. Let me just say a wedding is not a wedding without music and flowers. And a party isn’t one for me if there is no liquor flowing. What the hell am I buying a gift for if not at least an hour of free liquor?

When I talk about peoples parties and weddings I feel bad, because it’s not that I am just saying that my daughter’s party will probably be more impressive. I know it. My mother, the woman who has raised me to be the fabulous psychotic person that I am today is planning my daughter’s party with me. We are, the queens of parties. There will be a performer/ DJ. There will be brownie pop center pieces, pictures of my daughter wherever you turn. Catered food, two cakes, one for my daughter and one for everyone else. There will be games, and yes, flowers. I have hand made the grab bags, and my children’s shirts for the day.

I know this may sound, and looks as I read back obsessive. But my daughter who came 3 weeks earlier than expected, is one of the most important people I have in my life. Every time she smiles I see myself in her. When she scratches me in my chest so I won’t put her down I love her a little bit more. I love to see her clapping to music; hold her baby toys in her mouth while she scoots into her brothers room. I cry when she cries, (with the exception of bed time because that B hates to sleep). I don’t think that I have been more in love with another woman ever in my life.

So will there ever be an ending to the argument that my husband and I will probably have every year around this time? Probably not, next year I am thinking of a mommy and me nail party, haven’t quite run this by him, but you know, we will climb that hurtle when we reach it, or however the saying goes. Is having a genuine event for a child over kill? I don’t think there is anything too big when it’s proving your love to another. That said I probably would like a fossil bag and a surprise party for mine. I mean, go big or go home!